LDHD Day 7

Yesterday, Ted decided he wanted to make some red rice.  Being a retired chef, he sometimes doesn't get the concept of cooking for a family of four.

50 lbs. of red rice

Feel free to stop by and have some, take some home with you.

We had the Nicholson/Knight spawn out to the dock again.  We managed to get some tubing time in, but the weather was kind of crappy.  Hope you had fun, also hope you didn't pick up any foul language.  I kid...I kid.

After hours, we had company. The tallest man I’ve ever seen showed up again! Ha! Just kidding Mannie, you aren’t really the tallest man I’ve ever seen. But you had to know that we weren’t going to let you get away with that one. We’re gonna play a little game to see if anyone can figure out what we are talking about. ;)

Our friend from high school that we randomly ran into yesterday, Jim, brought his lovely wife out to hang with us on the IOP. And by lovely wife, I mean when they left Ted said under his breath as only Ted can do, “Damn Jim, she’s hot.” What fun! We sat around, traded stories, drank some beer, and then Jim busted out the yearbooks. Bwahaahaahaaa. Boy, was that fun.

This was fun, first of all, because of the three books Jim brought with him, Farmer Ted was in 2… both times as a freshman. Ted did not appear in the Senior yearbook because at the end of his “sophomore” 2nd freshman year, Ted got asked to leave Wando.

I enjoyed going through the yearbooks, as mine are all “Gone with Hurricane Hugo.” We had a little catch-up session. Mostly it ended with Ted saying “he/she’s my cousin,” or having him lick his eyebrows remembering a past flame from his days working at the Slip-N-Slide Waterpark.

All in all, a pretty enjoyable evening. One of the better spent I can remember to date. I want to point out that Jim and his lovely bride managed to drive away with out any damned red rice. Thanks a lot Manny, you fair weathered friend.

And really people? How many times can we insert Nipsey Russell into a poll and have the man get trounced? Clearly he was the best panelist. He closed all of the segments with his infamous rhymes. YouTube some Match Game people. And then YouTube some Nipsey Russell Match Game video. You will cry. Brett Somers, I am convinced, showed up drunk and carried her own flask in. She is the shizzle.

LDHD Day 6

Four years ago, Farmer Ted was diagnosed with lung cancer that had spread to his brain.  He had a partial lobectomy, refused chemo and radiation and was given 11 months to live.  Fast forward to today's visit to his Pulmonologist (we saw the Oncologist back in April), where Ted revealed a new trick.  If he breathes too heavy, he kind of blacks out for a second.  I kind of figured it might be a by product of only having 1 1/2 lungs, but the doc looks at Ted and says "Well, that's really weird."  Really weird?   Talk about using layman's terms.  Anyway, the prognosis is that Ted will live to take yet another deep breath...and then black out.  The doc thinks it may have something to do with a nerve that is attached to your heart that makes you faint when your oxygen level drops.  Or something like that.  When Ted asked what they can do to fix it, the doc replied "Pacemaker."  Pacemaker?

We sat around all afternoon making Pacemaker and heart jokes.  We also made fun of Ted's Speedo...

Which made us really happy we had found this gem today at the food store...

Heh. Heh. Heh.  Almost as classic as the Chock-Full-O-Nuts.

Ted is also playing with some smoked sausage...

Moving on, today was pretty laid back.  The weather this afternoon was iffy, so we had a little dock time but not much.  The spawn were bickering a bit...

Pardon me, while I whip this out.

Ahh, the old wooden spoon.  It was either that or the fly flapper back in the day.  Whenever we were acting up, roughhousing in the house and heard one of those crack against the counter, you froze in your tracks.

The eldest spawn reenacting the classic...

"Man I didn't do Nuthin'" Pose

Next...It looks like we will be corrupting our friends' spawn again.  Also putting up a new poll in a bit.  We are going to temporarily suspend the Herb Smackdown.  We left the napkin at home.  This one will be in honor of the best game show EVER.  Match Game.  Look out Gene Rayburn.

LDHD Day 5

The eldest spawn doesn't like the vacation acronym.  He thinks it sounds like some type of disorder.

Anyway, we went downtown yesterday (which for you folks not from here, downtown is the city of Charleston) and met up with The Plant Whisperer (my Mom) and Bob (not Smith) for lunch.  Instead of our usual bbq joint, we ended up at the Kickin' Chicken.  We're walking around trying to find a table for 6, when I hear "Michele?"  I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook.  I love it because when I turned around there stood the tallest man I've ever seen.  Just kidding Jim.  There stood a man we went to high school with and haven't seen for over 25 years.  If we weren't FB friends, we probably would've walked right past and not recognized each other.  Sorry I didn't remember you being so tall in high school Jim.  I was so short that everyone was tall to me.  I guess the whole inch I've grown since then gives me better perspective.  Either that or I'm convinced I have early onset Alzheimers.  My memory is shot.  I don't remember what I had for breakfast this morning.  After you said goodbye to us, my Mom asked if you played basketball in high school.  That I don't remember either, but I told her I was willing to bet you get asked that a lot.  It was crazy running into you like that.  We hope you take us up on our offer to drink some beer and tell some stories on the IOP before we leave!

As if that wasn't crazy enough.  We spent the afternoon corrupting the 12yo spawn of two other high school friends that we haven't seen in 25 years.  Mom made a FB post that her son was in town visiting his grandparents for a month and all of the kids in their neighborhood were in camp or out of town.  On our way home,  we picked him up for some beach and dock time.  We had a blast.  Hopefully his schedule isn't too full for the rest of the week and he can come out again.

Freakin' Facebook.  What is up with the new sidebar message thing?  There's a reason I had chat turned off before.  I don't want to chat Mark Zuckerburg.  Can we have the old messaging system back please?

Last night we went to Folly Beach to visit with Ted's roommate and his sister.  Farmer Ted has a super badass house just a 1/2 block from the beach, with a huge lake in the backyard and a 40 foot observation tower on the roof.  You can see the Cooper River Bridge and the Morris Island Lighthouse.  On July 4th, you can watch the succession of fireworks as they go off from the IOP to Kiawah/Seabrook.  Pretty cool.

Next...What did the 5 fingers say to the face?  And, we still haven't introduced you to Bob Smith's dog, Chelsea, the jellyfish spotter and dock lifeguard.

LDHD Days 3 & 4

Day 3 saw Not Ted's 40 Foot Yacht go home to Miami.  That's okay, we now have an unobstructed view of Might Be Ted's 80 Foot Yacht.  I am thinking about going to ask them if they'll just give the damn thing to us.  It has been parked on the creek for the better part of the last 3 years when the owners demolished yet another of a fast dying breed...the quaint beach cottage...and put up a hotel.  To my knowledge, that boat hasn't moved once.  Why not give it to people who will appreciate it?

It also saw some of this...

The nieceling spawnette got up on the kneeboard the VERY FIRST TIME SHE TRIED, pics not here b/c I don't put pics of other people's kids up on my public blog without permission.  She is beautiful and awesome and a lover of all things Muppets, and she's pretty athletic.  Well rounded.  Might make a good prom date for any of our readers with 12 year old boys, who will be subjected to a strict scrutiny from her Aunt Michele.  And her father, who owns a shotgun.  You better walk the straight and narrow with my girl.

And then we did some of this...

Day 4 saw us drive to Cola., SC to visit my youngest sister and her beautiful 5 week old baby girl.  You know I'll drive to get some baby time in.  We had a great time T!  She's just precious.  Sorry we missed you Phil.  Again no pics.  A.  See my rule above.  B.  I held a baby for the better part of an hour here and there and nobody took one picture of me with Miss Adorable.  grrr.  We're still on a learning curve over here.

We headed home and hit Melvin's in Mt. P., which is my kids FAVE BBQ place in SC.  They also have great sides.  Emeril proclaimed their Cheeseburger the Best of Cheeseburgery Goodness.  Here's a tip, go to the Mt. P. location if you're going to have Melvin's b/c the service and food at the James Island one SUCKS.

Finally, we ended up back where we started with a nice long walk...

 Next...Day 5, The Plant Whisperer and Roadside Kitchen James Island style.  And, we are getting a  foster child for the week!  Looking forward to corrupting the spawn of high school friends!

Lettuce Drive Home Dammit Day 2

Yeah, I'm gonna hafta start abbreviating the title.

Today saw the arrival of Bob Smith.  Who?  I guess I can give him up.  Bob is my father's Facebook alias.  He wants no part of FB, but rationalized that with 7 children and 11 grandchildren it might be the easiest way to see up to the minute goings on he really needed an anonymous page to log into and play catch up.  Bob Smith?  Really? LMFAO

Anyway, please don't try to friend him on FB.  It turns out he never even logs on to catch up on all of his Grandspawn.

Bob has an out of town gig, and arrived home late last night.  He enjoyed today while we...

...sunbathed, ate boiled peanuts, and...

partied on the dock, went tubing, and...

drank some beer, went knee-boarding, and...

got a little sunburnt, drank a little more beer, and...

drank some more beer, and had this for supper with my Sis, BIL and nieceling spawn...

Here's a fun story about this nieceling spawn.  Around her 4th or 5th birthday,we were hanging out at the dock and she was in my lap.  I asked her what she wanted for her bday most of all.  She hugged me and whispered in my ear that she wanted me to come live with her.  That's my girl.  She's a Muppets fan, as am I and all of us SC Wannabes...so, she got a huge Miss Piggy doll instead.  The next best thing you know.

Next...Hopefully the pics of all of todays events other than supper can be retrieved from my user error, and we have a Cars 2 bday party for some nephew type spawn.  And, Chelsea versus the Jellyfish.

Lettuce Drive Home Dammit Day 1

Food Shopping trip for essentials...

Piggly Wiggly Beer

SC tomatoes, real grits, Duke's Mayo & 10 pounds of green peanuts for boiling.

Blenheim Ginger Ale & Palmetto Beer

Spawn's Favorite Fried Chicken

Obviously

Then dock time...

The eldest spawn playing with Photobooth...

And, Ted napping b/c we left at 11pm and drove through the night.  He's been awake for over 24 hours. No pic b/c it's creepy to take a picture of someone sleeping.

Next...Lettuce Drive Home Dammit Day 2:  Bob Smith Returns

The King

If you read Farmer Ted's comments from yesterday's post (you really should go back to see what he's had to say on each one, there are some real doozies), then you know that he decided he wanted an Elvis Vegas cape.

So, we're sitting there watching FoodTV and he busts out with his desire...for the cape...minds out of the gutter people.  And to his astonishment, I pulled out my bag-o-tricks...

Coming to a town near you.

Well, he needed to add to his wardrobe...

Best Polyester Suit.

Ever.

Pimp

I have a love/hate relationship with Elvis.  I mean he's Elvis.  The King of Rock & Roll.  But, he died on my 8th birthday.  I got off the bus from school, all excited about my birthday.  Walked into my house...my Mom was crying...my Grandmother was sobbing.  Thanks King.  Oh well, I'm over it.  Mostly.

In GrowDammit news, we harvested these...

...and I ate this...

Next...Did I mention our Vacation?  Blog followers Jody & Mare have come up with some pretty funny names for it.  Anyone else care to take a stab?

The GrowDammit Followers Say

"I don't have no Thyme for you Parsley."  Actually, this was a pretty close poll.  Next up...Tarragon vs. Rosemary.  I personally think this will be interesting.  I use Rosemary more than Tarragon, but I like Tarragon better.  It's lighter and more refreshing, while Rosemary can be cloying.

Anyway, after a brief moment of panic when we thought we lost the napkin, we have a new poll for y'all.  I know, I know.  Your lives revolve around what we've got going on around here.

Not much new today, came home from work and laid down to rest our eyes for a few and the next thing you know we took ourselves a 2 hour nap.

Next...Still trying to name the Vacation.  Farmer Ted is still trying to rig up irrigation for when we go on Still Unnamed Vacation.  Thanks for not groaning at the pun.

Happy 4th!

We know y'all are on the edges of your seats wondering how the Wannabes celebrate Independence Day.  We spent the day cooking and cleaning.  Exciting, we know.  It is actually exciting.  Next weekend, we are headed to Chucktown for a little vacation with family and friends.  It was a so-so day here, so we cleaned.  I just hate coming back from a vacation to a dirty house.  It just emphasizes that the vacation is indeed over.

As for the food part of the day, we got our grill on and made a very special "Up Yours England" celebratory meal.  (Apologies to my BIL Phil, it has to be done once a year.)

We had...

GrowDammit Surf & Turf

With a Brown Sugar Asian Marinade to honor our debt to China.

What makes this GrowDammit?

Please note the skewer of GrowDammit BBQ'd yellow tomatoes.

Also, this feast is plated on a bed of GrowDammit Lettuce.  The final lettuce harvest took place yesterday, and we have 20 gallon bags full of lettuce in the fridge.  I shit you not.  That's got to be what?   Like 10 pounds of lettuce?  We will be using lettuce very creatively over the next week.  The lettuce bolted and started to flower, and since we are going on vacation (VACATION...I can't say that word enough) next week we pulled all of the plants.

Vacation.  Sarah Palin, you can suck it.  You called your bus tour a "family vacation" instead of an "attention whore media circus."  And, because every family names their summer vacation, we are looking for a good name for ours.  Maybe we'll win the lottery and be able to take our next vacation on a bus tour.

So, here we sit on the back deck reflecting on Freedom.  Vacation.  Listening to some asshole set off the very expensive fireworks he bought, before dark.  Yep, we can hear them clear as a cannon.  We just can't see them.

Have a good one blog peeps.  Stay safe.

Next...What to name our vacation?  

Fight!

This morning over breakfast and coffee on the deck, we were treated to a GrowDammit Wild Kingdom Moment.  The Battle of the Coneflowers.  In this corner, The Not So Elusive Anymore Hummer.  In the other corner, The Yellow Swallowtail.  The Swallowtail was happily collecting nectar when Hummer showed up.  Hummer did not like the butterfly being in his hood at all, and tried to chase it away.  The Swallowtail wasn't having it.  Hummer was relentless.  Swallow (should I be going there with this nickname given the other) seemed to give up and flew off, then in a bold move came back for Round 2.  Hummer grew tired and took a break on the fence, and came back for Round 3.  She was divebombing Swallow.  Swallow was ducking and dodging.  It was a nailbiter.

And the winner is...

The bee officiated...

The Dragon spectated...

Breakfast was blackened shrimp and spinach frittata.  We inhaled it before we took a picture of it.

Next...The Great Lettuce Harvest.