Wednesday, May 18, 2011

One Hundreds

Last week we had a classic spawnism on the way to piano.   Tonight we had no such luck, but I was reminded of a classic spawnism.  Again from the youngest.

Every year in the elementary school, they celebrate 100 days with a different activity.  One year the eldest collected 100 fall leaves and we taped them to a giant cutout of a tree that he had painted.  One year, my friend Jill slacked off and realized her daughter had to bring in 100 of something right as a blizzard hit.  She sent the child in with the one thing in the house they had 100 corks.  There's a reason my friend Jill is my friend.  I digress.

It was the youngest's 2nd grade year, and the teacher had the class sit down to do self portraits of what they thought they were going to look like at 100 years old.  All of my spawn's classmates were drawing themselves with wrinkles, dentures, gray hair, no hair.  Not my child.

Too say that he is literal minded is an understatement.  Notice the attention to detail on the tombstone, and the teacher's comment.

That teacher sure loved this child.  Always bringing the unexpected.

Next...Maybe we'll get back to gardening.  If it would EVER stop raining.


  1. I'm gonna tell ya... I laugh at this every time I see it; I mean... What more could I possibly add? (The teacher's comment is just the icing on the cake.)

    Upstairs hallway? Done. Well... Almost done. There's a few little places that need some attention but for all practical purposes, that bitch is done so next it's touch up work downstairs and then off to the guest room.

    So it's been raining for days but I'm not complaining about it. The garden needs plenty of it and besides, it saves on the water bill. Our Brussel sprouts are about waist high on me, maybe higher than that. I'm 6 foot 3 so if that gives you and indication on how big they are. I've never grown them before but I can tell you this... They're cool as shit; The sprouts pop out from around the stalk. They're cool.

    Jesus Christ, Jill.... 100 wine corks? I guess that it could be worse whenever you're snowed in... I can see me in that same boat but I'd end up sending the kid to school with 5 packs of smokes. ("And make sure you bring 'em back!")

    It's gonna be a "Clean the basement" type day. I love hanging out in the basement. (I call it my lair.) That's where all of the cool shit's at. Throughout all of this painting and gardening business... The lair has... Uh... Let's just say that... The lair has "been neglected" to put it mildly. to be quite honest... It looks like a fuckin' bomb went off down there; So I'll be busy with that for a while.

    And If you haven't figured it out by now... It's Me... Ted) I can't log in.... This host is a piece of shit.

  2. Thanks for reading our blog though.... Even though the host is a piece of shit. (There....I said it again.)

  3. A lair is another word for "man cave" except only superheroes use it...haha...

    Brussels Sprout/ These are those tiny cabbages I've only learned to enjoy recently.
    It's a freak of life that often what we hate to eat as children we learn to love as adults.

    R.I.P= lol...your spawn speaks with straight tongue ;-)

  4. Still laughing at the spawnism! I totally love kids who think like this. It has to give the teachers the will to keep on!

    Am I the only one who hears the teacher's "Oh my goodness..." in a Minnesotan accent?

    We used to tease Wilson that if we ever had the money to finish our basement, we would make her a Grammy suite down there. It became a joke that it would be her 'Bat Cave', and poor Mark was worried that it would take over his 'Man Space'. I think I am down there more than he!

  5. Mare, I'm thinking my spawn and yours would really hit it off.

  6. The "Bat Cave...." That's some rich shit, Mare.

  7. Oh, yes. I can just imagine the fun they would!

    Farmer Ted, Wilson was cool like that. You would have loved her. =)