Friday, September 23, 2011

In the interest of being habitual line crossers...

I got home from work today to find Ted reminiscing about the good ol' days when he and his cousin wanted to have their own punk band.  Named the Motherfuckers.  I realize that for some reason that word has come out of my keyboard a lot lately.  Because it is Awesome.

Anyway, Ted has regaled the spawn and I many times with their song "Assface."  I'll let him fill you in on the lyrics.  So, he apparently spent the afternoon sharing GG Allin YouTube videos with one of his buddies.  Click this link if you want to see a strung out punk rocker walk out on the stage naked, punch someone in the face, take a crap, throw it at the crowd, eat some and then bludgeon himself in the head with a whiskey bottle.  If you get the picture and don't want to see that, I understand.  If you liked it and want to see more classics like  "Suck My Ass It Smells," "Fuck Authority" and "Guns, Bitches, Brawls and Bottles," they are all on YouTube.  Sickos.

In other news a friend of Ted's commented on his FB page regarding yesterday's late night ramblings about bathrobes and Pluto.  Her conclusion was that Pluto is the Tranny of Planets.  This must be what keeps me up at night.

There is a new poll.  Basil just barely edged out Thyme, so if feel strongly about Rosemary or Chives Vote.

Next...You never know.

P.S.  My opinion is that there are no bad words, only inappropriate times to use them.  I've never censored their (the spawn's) music or media for language or violence.  Only for sexual content when it was/is inappropriate for their age.  My rule is that listening to the music or watching R rated movies is a privilege, and the minute I get that phone call from the school or another parent about their poor behavior the privilege is gone.  I have never gotten that phone call.  It works for us.  My theory is that this is my rebellion for the fact that I wasn't allowed to have Prince's album 1999 back in the day.  Stop judging me and blame Bob Smith.


  1. What can I say... I went through a "Interesting stage" in my youth. Yeah.... we wanted a punk band but my Father put the brakes on THAT shit. We were gonna be original and have a bad ass xylophone and just be... well.... The Motherfuckers! He figured that we'd never get any billboard so he wasn't gonna invest any money into our project. I love in the video above how Dude rolls out on stage.... Naked... And then boxes the livin' FUCK outta some chick and then at the end... Whacks himself in the head with a liquor bottle. Man..GG Allin... Ever the showman.

    I figured that Basil was gonna take the last poll because everyone know what to do with Basil... Like Rosemary. Rosemary's gonna take this one... I can see it coming a mile away. Actually... I hate Rosemary but i voted for it anyways...

    I'm gonna take the liberty to just copy and paste my friend Nic's opinion on yesterday's blog post.... About Pluto being a planet... here it is...

    "Great post. I'm 100% down with the comments regarding work ethic and the shocking level of apparel impropriety in today's society. But, Pluto? Sorry, Pluto is just a glorified comet, an icy, malformed rock, which does not a planet make. It's original classification can be chalked up to insufficient telescope power. Once we got the ability to get a good long look, it just couldn't pass. A little like looking at a good quality drag queen from across the room and thinking she is a hot lady, but when you get within a few feet the Adam's Apple is practically poking you in the eye. Pluto's not complaining; it was debated over 30+ years and they even created a special classification "Dwarf Planet," so that it wouldn't feel bad."

    Now how can you argue with THAT?

  2. I can argue with that. My Very Eager Mother Just Served Us Nine? Nine what? Nine Trannies? Nine Dwarves? My childhood is unraveling before my eyes.

  3. My Very Eager Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas. Am I the only one on the damn planet (a real one) who ever learned this to remember the planets and their order?

  4. I've never heard it either, but it is brilliant! Well, anything to help me remember things is good.

    I like that you guys are habitual line crossers. It makes the line crosser hidden inside of me squeal with glee! ;)

    I actually let the expletives fly at someone in a dream last night. It felt really good...lmao!

    I voted for chives. I do like rosemary, but chives dress up and make things taste so fresh. Plus, I wanted to stand up for the underdog today.

  5. We learned it, but instead of Eager, it was Excellent.

    -Lara (Still can't get the Spotty login to work)

  6. @Mare, you get the difference between bad words and inappropriate words and when to use them. Yours happen to be in a dream.

    @Lara, HA! I'm not crazy. Take that all you My Very Eager Mother Doubters. But what is the new pizza? Now that Pluto isn't a planet anymore, much less a piece of pie?

  7. Here's a verse of our best selling song..."Ass Face." Actually.... We never sold a copy.....(Of ANYTHING.)


    Ass Face... Bitch... That's what you've got
    Ass face ... Baby, you can suck my nut
    Ass Face... (YEAH!) That's what I said
    You don't got a face
    You've got an ass, instead.

  8. Andrew is now 14 and thinks it cool that he is allowed to say 'bad' words. I try to tell him that part of being mature enough to swear is being mature enough to know when it is appropriate and when it is not and it is NOT appropriate around your 6 year old sister. He is starting to get it. :=)

  9. Oh and the little four year old boy that I babysit has learned the word 'Dammit'. It may have come from an episode of his Nanny pouring applesauce and having the entire container spill onto the coutertop - right after she spent her hard labor to make the first batch ever from scratch. Needless to say, the five second rule applied since the counter was just washed and that applesauce was promptly scraped back into the container!! ;=)